By: Tehniat Fatima
Taking a step forward, she is pushed two steps backward
Feet slipping from under her legs
Life itself, had sucked her breath
Head throbbing, guilt clawing
Sleepless nights welcome her, haunted memories envelope her
Her insides a black void;
An abyss which she has plunged into
Sensing no way out
No escape, no beginning.
Flashes of the ending, of her nemesis, of peace at last flicker across her mind
Her heart gradually blackening
Regret, pain, piety and blame swallows her whole
Anxiety grinning at it’s control
Yet, she carries on
Plastering smiles on her face, faking laughs
Living but not savoring
Striving to move on, to shift her heart from one loved one to another
As they all embrace peace
Outside she is fine, her insides are anything but.
Externally she is an optimistic person.
While inwardly, her anchor is burning her lungs
Cutting her oxygen supply
There come days, when she tastes the sensation of pain and mildly enjoys it.
With no tears left to cry, no sleep left to lose
She surrenders in hope to find tranquility
To be left alone
To fix her shattered self
But glue had never been enough for her splintered heart
What she wanted, was not to get hurt
Learn not to hate herself
Alas, she ended on her knees, yelling for a break, an out
Yet, knowing there was none.
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